Here I am, jotting down bit to bit about what I think about life. This is life according to me. -Qarin Almaduri, 22

Content



There has been lots of ups and down throughout my entire life; the ups, allows me to enjoy my time being at top and the downs, on the other hand, allows me to get back up and rise higher every time. You see, I've regretted lots of wrong choices that I've made in life, but those choices is the thing that made me the strong person that I am today. I mean it, really. I'm a physically strong person, that's one thing d: but trust me, I can finally say that beneath this tough skins and bones, I'm just as tough, and I'm really, really proud that I can describe myself that way today. So, all the wrong choices that I've made in life -- are they really WRONG as I thought they were, or are they just the plot that God has set from the beginning? I'm not sure myself, but right now, at this moment, I really wanna believe that all things that had happened are His plan, and I'm merely the actor on this stage He created.

Today, I have loads of things to be grateful about. A home to live in, college to study at, friends and family all around me. It's almost impossible for me to feel regretful about anything currently. I feel content, really, and there's one entity to be thankful to; God. Along years of blogging, I've only been writing sad, despondent stuff as if my life is made of nothing but those. However, the reality is different; I have a lot to be thankful about. It's just I feel like writing a lot more when I'm sad. Writing helps ease my pain. And I believe my writings have helped others too for what's better when you are tearing but somebody who could understand the way you feel? Somebody who doesn't mind sailing the boat with you, despite the storm that coming?

To those that I haven't spoken for a while, I'm healthy and I'm happy. Therefore, don't worry. The only plan I have now is to finish my degree, get a job that I enjoy and make money out of it to support my family.


Till then,
M. Qarin Al Maduri

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

assalamualaikum qarin. good morning! let me use bahasa rojak sebab lagi senang. my english is not as good as yours, yet. aku tak tahu bila Tuhan gerakkan hati kau nak check comment tapi takpelah. aku cuma nak cakap yang aku suka kau. I know this is too sudden tapi kalau tak cakap rasa sedih pulak. takut tak sempat haha. kita jumpa in real life and had a very little chat. I'm good in hiding my feelings tau. kita bercakap pun benda yang sangat simple, contoh kau nak ini atau itu. tapi tu pun dah buat aku happy hahaha. aku dah lama kenal kau dari cfs lagi tapi tak sekelas. start sem ni aku macam apahal ada magnet ni kahkah. tak semua kelas kita sama tapi tiap hari kita ada kelas sama #kenatahu.

aku suka perhatikan orang apatah lagi kau (pls jgn takut). aku tahu kau cakap kasar, suka mencarut dan kadang aku sendiri takut tapi aku hidup dengan manusia macam kau, ayah aku. sebab tu kot aku rasa tak kisah. kisah cinta kau pun aku tahu. aku bukan jenis dengar2 gossip apa semua ni. kalau aku nak tahu, aku tanya sendiri tuan punya badan. faham kan? jadi aku tahu walaupun aku confess in the future pun, belum tentu kau akan lepaskan dia. aku faham. aku tak harap lebih pun.

banyak benda aku tak tahu pasal kau. kau misteri, one of the reason aku suka kau. aku mampu dengar apa yang kau dengar dan baca apa yang kau tulis. aku suka baca poems tapi only yang berkenan sahaja. aku tak kisah siapa writer. aku pun suka tulis poems tapi aku main hentam keromo saja. sebab tu aku nak major in linguistics #kenatahu. tapi aku happy lepas baca tweet kau nak amik lit. which kau memang passionate in poetry lah. aku dengar lagu yang kau share kat instag., aku dengar cover songs kau. inilah rupa stalker sebenar haha. sorry. ini je caranya untuk aku tahu diri kau.

hm sorry qarin sebab tak cakap depan2. nak solve problem aku boleh tapi nak libatkan soal hati, keras gila tak terluah. lagi satu, I miss your writing. jangan lupa untuk update blog. ada peminat tegar disini. don't worry weh. in shaa Allah aku tak bawa sebarang kesulitan dalam hidup kau.

akhir kata, aku harap someday aku boleh share playlist aku dengan kau :) have a good day. this is probably my first and the last comment. sorry for the looooong comment (patut report ni haha) sebenarnya, aku sendiri tak faham ini hanya sekadar suka atau apa. tapi as long as aku happy, aku okay! hehe BYE..!

Anonymous said...

haishh lupa pula. good luck for everything you do! and um... if you love her that much, don't ever ever give up because I'll never give up on you. let The Mighty do His job untuk tentukan sama ada kau patut tahu siapa aku atau tidak hehe. kurangkan mencarut tu. tak baik untuk budak kecik dengar xD

Anonymous said...

I was very high last night. abaikan apa-apa yang aku dah cakap. aku tak boleh delete comment so please deletekan. thank you